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If someone had told me that
adulting meant being in charge of deciding what we eat every single night
forever and ever until I die, I might not have signed up for this gig. (Let’s
face it, that’s just one of the many reasons that growing up was overrated, am
I right?) As it is, I can’t figure out what I was in such a hurry for in the
first place. Sure, you get to eat cake for dinner if you want, but if you’re a
parent, you’re either going to have to share or hide in a closet like the cake
hoarding refugee that you are. (I’m not sure that takes the sting out of
getting up and going to work every day though.) Disclaimer: If you’re single, live alone, and are eating cake in a closet, there might be some deeper issues that need
addressing.
Dinner has been a point of contention
in my house for quite some time. Mostly because my husband likes to ask what we
are having for dinner. Every day. At nine in the morning. Basically, I’m still
finishing the magic juice that gives me life (A.K.A. Bean juice A.K.A. nectar
of the coffee bean A.K.A. ambrosia of the Gods) and he’s asking what we are
having for dinner. I’m not sure if it’s because my strangle-o-meter is not
quite at zero yet (since I haven’t finished my daily dose of java) or if it’s
because men are from Mars and women are from Jupiter (Venus? Alaska? You’d
think I’d know this one, right?), but there’s nothing like having to answer
what you’re having for dinner when you’ve barely eaten breakfast. To say the
least, it irked me. And because the human race needs to create likenesses in
their own images, little “mini-me’s” if you will, the middle schooler started
picking up this habit of dinner questioning.
Oh for the love of all that’s holy!
Are you kidding me right now?
So I, in my infinite wisdom, decide
that I am going to create a monthly calendar that has ALL the dinners on it. (Actually,
the blank calendar that I printed out actually has FIVE weeks, so it’s like a
bonus month instead of a regular month.) Surely THIS will stop the myriad of questions,
right? It did. I’m sure it didn’t have anything to do with me telling him to
check the calendar any time I was on the receiving end of the grievous dinner
query. Or stating that the calendar now preempts all endeavors to even make an inquiry
as to dinner plans. That’s right, I went through ALL OF THIS NONSENSE just
to stop being annoyed by a single, frustrating question. Hey, you can’t say
that I’m not motivated or creative.
As a side benefit of the calendar,
I don’t have to put a lot of thought into the grocery lists anymore either. I
check the dinner schedule to see what I need and voila! Instant grocery list! Okay,
well, it’s not magic. I still have to write it. But now there’s less agonizing
at least.
The problem with this is if I HATE
planning singular meals every day, how much worse is it to come up with 35 at
once? Yeah, it’s not that great. On the bright side though, I can usually
repeat a meal here and there as long as there’s at least 3 weeks in between.
This, however, leads to another problem: putting meals on there that everyone likes. Why is that a problem you ask? Because
those meals are all DIFFERENT. Yes, sprinkling those meals throughout the month
means that everyone is miserable about what they’re eating on different days.
Do you know what dinner that makes everyone happy? Every other Friday’s “eat
out” night. Yes, the one where I don’t have to cook and the meal most likely
with the least nutritional content is the one that saves the day. Hey, even
chefs need days off, right? Creating culinary masterpieces like Kraft a La Mac
and Cheese and Petite Frozen Fish Filets is an exhausting business, alright?)
So now that I have come up with a
fix to that dilemma, how about tackling that dinner rut? Anyone else out there in
a stuck in a grotesque groove of the same old, same old? Yeah, picky eater,
time constraints, and lack of F’s to give pretty much mean that we are rotating
the same seasonal appropriate meals in an endless, exhausting dinner cycle. To
remedy that, I have taken to occasionally scouring the internet for family-friendly-picky-eater-approved-doesn’t-take-all-night-to-cook meals to throw
in the mix. (What this means is that the picky eater now gets 3 more meals to
be miserable over. Though he did like the crescent roll pizza, so maybe
progress after all?)
So for all those exhausted parents
out there who are living the dinner struggle right now, I see you. Not that
that really helps you much unless you were just looking for some validation. I
will leave you with this tip: Grilled cheese sandwiches (and tomato soup in
cold weather) make an excellent go-to menu filler. I know, amazing right? If I
keep this up, I’m going to be the next star on the Food Network. You’re
welcome.
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