Can You Smell That Smelly Smell?

I'm slowly losing my mind. Is it my kids? No. Well, actually yes, but no more than usual. Is it my husband? No. Well, again, no more than usual. It's a smell. A strange smell that I can't seem to figure out the origin of or, more importantly, how to eradicate it.

Of course, I'm the only one who can smell this smell.

So, apparently, at some point when my head was turned, someone came and sprinkled some cray cray dust on me and a smell was born. Because my kids look at me like I have two heads when I tell them it stinks in here. My husband, having lived with his crazy (but lovable!) wife all this time at least gives a dutiful walk around, sniffing for the offending odor. But I know he thinks I'm imagining things.

The worst part? When he asks me to describe it, I can't. It's unlike anything I've ever smelled before. It's like a plastic-y, chemical-ish type of underlying stink that makes me want to hurl. It's that offensive. Well, to me at least. I've always had the bloodhound nose. I'm pretty sure the rest of my family could live in squalor and not notice a difference in the air quality. It just doesn't seem to bother them. Me, on the other hand? I probably sniff the air more than our family dog. (And that's saying something since he's never not sniffing.)

And just an FYI: Air deodorizing spray never really takes the smell out of a room. It just blankets it. So now you have two offensive stinks, the original one and the one made from combining it with air freshener. Considering my sensitivity to scents, this makes me want to live outside for a week until my sinuses regain some semblance of normalcy. If, however, you want to see something really amusing, come over and watch me try to find this nefarious fiend of a smell. I'm sniffing objects on counters and opening cupboards and walking from room to room to see where it has permeated the most. Because surely the stinkiest stink would contain the cause of said stink, right?

So, if I suddenly have no hair, it could very well be that I snapped from the sheer lunacy that is my nose trying to find the smelly smell that's making that smell and yanked it all out while incoherently babbling. As long as my pretty, padded cell doesn't have any stank on it, I'm sure I'll adjust to my new surroundings in no time.