Whoever Came Up With Staycation Is Stupid

Someone out there termed the phrase "staycation". I'm sure they thought they were being clever, manipulating the word vacation and amking a word that means taking time off but not going anywhere. And whoever it is, I think they're stupid. Because staycation is just a nice way of saying "We're not going on vacation this year for one reason or another but we're making it sound like it was a planned thing by calling a staycation".

Believe me, I'd rather be on vacation rather than oh, almost everything else in my life. It goes: Kids first, husband second and family third. The next 300 slots are vacation. Would I rather be home? No, I'd rather be on vacation. Would I rather be at work? No, I'd rather be on vacation. Would I like to eat in a box with a fox or a house with a mouse? No, I'd rather be on vacation. Would I rather be taking care of a sweet little baby? No....oh, wait. Okay, but just for this year. Next year, I'd rather be on vacation.

The hard part is that even though my brain rationalizes why we aren't in warm, beautiful Florida this year, my heart is longing for sandy beaches and sunny skies. Since the two don't live in the same neighborhood and don't run in the same social circles, the brain is over ruled by those emotional ties to vacation.

Awww, ain't she purty?

And I'll tell you what else, vacation is like crack. One taste and you're hooked for life. I'm a junkie. Long weekends don't cut it anymore. They're still good. I'm still a fan. I love long weekends, just in a brother/sister kind of way. I'm passionately, madly in love with vacations though. The sense of relaxation that permeates your very soul...ahhh, I miss that. The smell of the ocean first thing in the morning? Yup, miss that too. Eating badly and being able to use the vacation crutch? Yeah, really missing that!

Yeah yeah, I'm putting my big girl panties on and dealing with it. Reluctantly. I'm going to enjoy the "stay" part of the staycation and spend some time with the kids and maybe pull out my inner arts and crafts Mom and dust her off. It's been awhile since she's come over and I think the kids would get a kick out of her. She's much "funner" than do your homework and make your bed Mom. She's over  a lot and the kids really are starting to feel like she's worn out her welcome.

So if you feel bad for me, feel free to send me a week in your time share on the ocean. Kidding! (Well, mostly.) Until then, I'll be in the kitchen with a two gallon jug of margaritas, dancing to um, whatever music would make someone think of Florida. (An orange juice commercial?)

Ok, ok, so this is what I'll miss the most about a real vacation.