Karma's Punch In The Forehead

I don't know whose cosmic cornflakes I pissed in this week but karma has come and punched me straight in the forehead. Think I'm exaggerating? Well, let's break this weekend down, shall we?

This is Memorial Day weekend. Hoorah! A three day weekend! I'll have an extra day to get crap done! Oh, except that it's going to pour for 2 of the 3 days. What does two straight days of rain mean? How about baby boy's t-ball game being cancelled? There goes an outlet for him to run around and get rid of his excess energy. Or the fact that no one gets to go outside and burn energy? We're all going to sit and grow mold and corrode in here. If I wasn't with them all morning, I'd suspect someone came and gave the youngest two 5 pounds of pixie stix. Each. Because they are seriously hyped up. How many times can I tell these damn kids not to run in the house? 38 1/2 times. Is it bed time yet? What do you mean it's only 4:30? Is that clock broken? All the damn clocks in this house are broken! What the ?!?!

Or that all of us are stuck in this tiny house breathing each other's air and getting on each other's nerves? I turn around and bam! There's the youngest, or the dog, or hubby. Listen people, haven't you seen Dirty Dancing? This is my space. That is your space. Let's respect the space. Why can't you be like your older brother? I haven't seen him in hours. Go corrode in your room like he does. No, not all the time. Just today. It's a special occasion. We're gong to celebrate "Happy Give Each Other Space Day But Most Especially Mom So She Doesn't Lose Her Shit And Spend The Rest Of The Weekend In A Bottle Of Wine" Day. Doesn't that sound like fun? Now go to your rooms and let the celebrating begin.

Then there's the fact that Saturday was supposed to be the day we went to the amusement park. The one that's less than 10 minutes away that baby boy, who's a worldly six years of age now, has never been to and if he was any more excited about it, he'd be twins. Until it's raining so hard you can barely see out the rain spattered windows and we have to tell him that it's closed because of the rain (Total parent lie. They could have been open but we were not going to traipse around in a downpour in 47 degree weather.) and he's super bummed. Probably not as bummed as his parents because walking around an amusement park for 6 or 7 hours is a great way to manage a 7:30 bedtime for your completely exhausted kids. Now they're bouncing around at 9:30 being told 14 times to "Go to sleep!!". Except for the oldest. He's still conducting his experiment to see if he can become one with his bed if he stays in it long enough.

Then there's the fact that Friday was my daughter's medication management check up for her ADHD and they changed her medication. And when we go to fill her prescription they don't have it. So we check all the area pharmacies and they don't have it either. So we bring it back to our regular pharmacy, who's going to order it, but because of the f'n holiday (They probably didn't add the f'n. That might have been me.) it's not going to be in until Wednesday. WEDNESDAY? Today is Friday. She has school Tuesday. So let me get this straight. She has one more pill and I am supposed to NOT kill her over this long weekend so I can send her back to school Tuesday, still unmedicated, and pray her teachers don't kill her, just because it takes five days to send some pills? Have some sympathy people. Overnight it. Next day shipping. Something. Have you ever lived with a pre-teen girl with ADHD?

So to summarize: Two days, inside, with three children. Baby boy needs some sport to play that doesn't involve bouncing off walls and can't due to weather. Middle girl needs medication to save her life from her mother who ran out of hair to pull out and wine to medicate herself. Oldest needs a shower and clean sheets because his science experiment to see if he can grow mold worked. Dad, who is the sole sane one in the great Memorial Day Debacle of 2013, owes his life to ESPN.

The one nice day of the weekend, Monday, will be sunny and 68. Which is great since the oldest will have to actually leave his bed to play his clarinet at the parade in town. And we're having a cook out with family, the first people to see us in public after the great Memorial Day Debacle of 2013. Hopefully Mr. Meteorologist is on our side this time and doesn't decide to change the forecast. Although I do think it's a little cruel to rub in that the nice weather IS coming.....just in time to go back to work.