The Things I Miss The Most

When you're 17, mostly you can't wait to be "grown up". You look forward to all of things that you'll be able to do, not realizing that 15 years from now, THESE are your glory days. Here are what I miss the most about being 17:

Eating whatever I wanted (even fast food) and not gaining a single ounce. Ah, the good old days. When my metabolism worked as hard as Rocky Balboa training for a fight. When counting calories didn't exist and I could literally have my cake and eat it too. Even at 10:30 at night. Without consequences. When you're 17, you don't think about trans fat and cholesterol and other scary old people afflictions because you're invincible. You're hot stuff! You're almost 18 baby!

And speaking about 17 year old bodies.... Remember how nice it was to have all your parts where they're supposed to be? Of course, by parts, I mean my ladies, my tatas, my girl bumps. Yes, back before gravity and years of nursing children took their toll. Or the smooth, unmarred, supple skin that was my stomach? Before it got married to stretch marks and had twins: varicose veins and stretch marks jr. If I had known what 3 kids would have done to my perfectly good body, I might have appreciated it more when I had it. (Oh who am I kidding? When are 17 year old girls ever appreciative of their bodies?)

Being able to go to the bathroom or have a phone conversation in peace. I can go hours at a time in separate rooms with my children and I being busy. Until I have to go to the bathroom or use the phone. It's only then that they remember all the questions that they've been dying to ask me all day. Such as, "Why is the sky blue? or Can I have a snack?" They like to save arguments for when I'm on the phone so that I have to excuse myself from the conversation, hold my hand over the mouthpiece, and yell like a rabid lunatic for them to "Knock it off, I'm on the phone!!" I think the reason some animals eat their young is that they get tired of trying to have conversations over the sound of the squabbling.

Staying up as late as I wanted and not needing a caffeine IV the next day. Remember sleepovers or parties with your friends where you stayed up all night and still managed to function the next day? You just needed an extra soda or cup of coffee to help fuel you along. And it only took one night of regular sleep and you were back on schedule. Nowadays I'm wrecked if I stay up past 12 and my schedule is out of whack for a week. Every night I get into bed and am supremely blissful to be there. If there's anything to make you feel like an old fart, it's watching your bedtime get earlier and earlier every year. 

Walking into a room and remembering why I'm there. I used to laugh at my own mother and her constant ability to space out. I always attributed it to growing up in the 60's and 70's and all the peace, love, and drugs that was all the rage. Now I know it was just Mom Brain. I'm not even all the way through my 30's yet and I can walk into a room to do something and not remember by the time I've walked the 8 steps to get there. Now I get to play "mental mind reverse walk through" where I try to rewind my thought process to see if I can figure out where the light bulb went on and prompted me to leave the room in the first place.

Although there are quite a few things I'll miss about being 17, there are a few perks to being the age I am now. Like being able to drive after 9 (If I'm not already in bed for the night) and being old enough to have a cocktail (or 4) after a hard day. I guess I'll have to be content to lecture my own children and drive them crazy. After all, how many times did we roll our eyes when our parents said, "Someday you'll look back at these days and wish you could go back. Don't be in such a hurry to grow up!"