Act Now and Other Crap I'd Say To Peddle Junk

Are you married? Do you have children or furry pets in your house? Do you clean only to turn around and see that everything is dirty again after only five minutes? Then we have the product you've been waiting for!

It's the Crystal Cleaning Cage! Just place your messy family and pets inside the Crystal Cleaning Cage and voila! Instead of mere minutes, enjoy hours of your beautiful, clean spaces! No more muddy paw prints right after you've mopped! No more sticky fingerprints on freshly washed windows! No more crumbs on your pristine counters!

Best of all, it's easy to use! Just construct your Crystal Cleaning Cage (air holes may require some assembly) and it's ready to use immediately! The spacious interior fits your messiest spouses, children, even those pesky shedding pets! The clear walls lets them feel connected to their environment while removing the capacity for new messes to be made. They'll still be able to see the tv while you enjoy time spent in your clean house!

But that's not all!

If you call within the next five minutes, we'll upgrade you to the Grande Cage. Perfect for large families or those with stinky teenage boys! The Grande Cage comfortably fits most larger families, even those who also have the most sheddable pets like Golden Retrievers and German Shepards!

But wait, there's more! The first 100 callers will also get the deluxe pack of Cage Fresheners. Cage fresheners smell like grape kool-aid and add a pleasant faux grape scent to any environment. They'll also get the 1 page instructional guide on other uses for the Crystal Cleaning Cage, which is basically anything that you would possibly need a huge, Plexiglas cage for!

Would you believe there's even more?

Call in the next 3 minutes and 48 seconds and we'll even cut the price of this innovative product. That's right, we'll slash the price from 19 payments of $48.67 to 18 payments of $48.67! That's one whole payment!

So if you're tired of turning around after you've cleaned to see the hurricane sized mess that your loved ones made for you, get the Crystal Cleaning Cage! Only available for a limited time so don't let it get away!